Spam (No, Not the Mystery Meat) and Crackers


I was just doing a little maintenance on my bloggy admin thing, and I went over to clear out my spam comments.  My goodness, some of these are hilarious!  I thought I’d share them with you, because I love you.

Mind you – these were all on my Tattoos post, which makes me giggle on a few parts:

1 – I posted that almost a month ago.

2 – These are all from just a few days ago.

3 – None of these are even remotely related to tattoos, neither temporary nor permanent, to where the comments would even possibly be posted to get the desired spam effect.

4 – Where do these things come from??  I swear, I’ll never understand where spam stuff comes from.  Do real humans type these things in some crazy matrix code that just spits them out randomly over the internet?  Or are just random sets of words combined electronically by spam machines and inserted into random forums that have certain strings of words?  Or is it just bored people trying in the silliest manner possible to lead people to random links that will destroy their hard drives?  I just don’t get it!

Either way – back to my comments.  🙂  Again, Tattoos was posted on March 13…

  • On 4/3, e cigarette reviews stopped by to say hi – “microsoft windows vista ultimate 32 bit might be something you want to look into. I know your site is about microsoft windows vista ultimate 32 bit but seriously.  I have seen sites like yours branch out into other areas and its been to their benefit.”
    Mr. e cig, first of all, I have no idea what you’re talking about.  Second of all, my site isn’t even a little bit about Microsoft anything.  Third of all, I don’t want to branch out – I very much prefer my Doodle and random mishaps or rants being what my blog is about.  But seriously, if you don’t like it, don’t swing by anymore.  And you can keep your Windows Vista Ultimate 32 Bit, I have Windows 8, punk.  You’d probably know that if you read any of my other recent posts and saw that I just got a new computer.  Bye, Mr. e cig.
  • Later on 4/3, ringing ears left me a note – “Amazing. That was a good read. I will twitter this blog for later. I like your style.”
    Mr. ringing, thank you for the kind words, but if I may interject…  I do believe the verb of using Twitter is called Tweet or Tweeting.  Seriously, though, thank you for stopping by, and do twitter my blog for later.  Have a great day, ears.
  • And once more on 4/3, seo australia came over – “It’s very trouble-free to find out any topic on web as compared to books, as I found this article at this site.”
    Oh dear, Mr. seo, have you just learned of the wonders of the internet?  Books typically only have one topic, and there’s only so much a book could cover about any given topic.  Conversely, the internet is practically endless, so you’re sure to be able to find a whole ton of random info on just about anything you want.  Now, seo, do be careful while searching around for new articles and topics as not everything that is posted on the web is true.  Good luck, and happy surfing!
  • I guess he felt bad for being such a jerk, because on 4/4 e cigarette reviews came back.  …with a totally different website, e-mail, and ip address?  Hmm, was this a different person with the exact same name?  Weird.  Either way, he responded – “Ok, enough said. This was probably the best article I have read on Tattoos at Stay at Home Trauma today and I often do research daily on the subject of best e cigarette brands review.  Thanks for sharing with the world. Cheers!”
    Wow, e, I’m fairly certain you are the same person, because you just stuck your foot in your mouth again.  Very flattering telling me this is the best article you’ve read all day – not very flattering, however, to narrow down the “best of” subject matter to specifically Tattoo articles on my blog, and especially not when you’re comparing this to e cigarette brand reviews.  You’re welcome for sharing with the world, but, uh, I think maybe you missed the point?  Seriously, e, don’t come back.  Cheers.
  • Then the spam traffic kind of slowed down for a few days, and on 4/7 cukiernia katowice was over – “I love your wordpress design, where would you down load it from?”
    Dearest Cukie (would that be like cookie or kooky?), thank you for the kind words, but I wouldn’t download it from anywhere.  If you want the same awesome wordpress design that I have, just go over to the free themes and find it.  Super quick and easy.  Good luck!

And just so you guys don’t get mad at me, here’s a cracker stackin’ Doodle for ya!


7 responses »

  1. Spam is hilarious! I have noticed that the ones that actually make some sense and seem legit always end up being from online dating/sex type sites.

    You wonder if these people or businesses realise their email address has been hijacked. It happened to me a couple of years ago, I woke up and thousands of spam had been sent to my entire contacts list. This included the kids’ schools, doctor, accountant, travel agent, work, everyone! So naturally my isp suspended my account without notifying me, and it was when I called them and started noticing all the strange replies in my inbox that I learned what had happened. Pretty much every email sent from my account contained a virus. It was not fun sorting it out, especially with a very unhelpful internet provider who would suspend first and ask questions later. GAH!

  2. Some of the spam is pretty incredible. I’m pretty certain it wouldn’t be hard to create an entire book of poems using them without changing a word.

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